Monday, November 29, 2010

Why I still don't like Thanksgiving

I can't remember a time that I looked forward to Thanksgiving or particularly enjoyed the holiday when it arrived.

Yes, I have many blessings and try to take time often to count them and be thankful for them. This past year was no exception. There has been a lot of good to be grateful for--just look back at the entries for the year. But this has never had an effect on my feelings for the Thanksgiving holiday. It is an obligation that at least comes with my mom's great cooking--definitely a bright spot in an otherwise yucky day.

Death and disaster hang over Thanksgiving for me. It has often been the first holiday that comes close after someone dies. In fact, one year, a cousin died in a traffic accident that very day. I used to dread the coming of fall, wondering what catastrophe would hit and have to be the elephant in the room over Thanksgiving.

I'm not making this up, here's just the ones I remember off the top of my head:

My father died last year

a bad breakup for me in the 80s

my grandfather
my mom's cousin
my cousin
my grandmother
hospital visits for both of Pete's parents

So, not the holiday for me.

But--now I choose not to hold my breath from Sept-Nov. I take it a day at a time and try to appreciate whatever is going on right at the moment. If something bad does happen, then I'll walk through that with my family and friends when it comes. But why miss out on all the great stuff of life in the meantime?

Plus, there's mom's stuffing, yams, turkey and a thousand vegetables. And pie--one of the great joys of life. Man, I like pie.